Essays, poems and Stories of an African-American

Thursday, 23 May 2013

Qui Tacet Consetir Videtur: He who is silent is understood to consent


He who is silent is understood to consent. I faced up and made noise against my weaknesses. I no longer consented to what relegated me to being the loser. I had these three deep seated and jealously guarded fears.  I had earlier made a decision. I agreed to myself never to raise any argument on the subject of my own weaknesses. ‘What are those 3 fears?’ You may be driven to ask. Yes, number one on the list is vanity, secondly a tendency for prodigality and thirdly a contentment with simplicity. I do want what is good. I guess this is every one’s story.  I want to show the goodness of life and treasures. I know hard work is fruitful. I have always driven myself so hard to achieve a better life. It is a lonely path. It is not taken by many. I did give up when I realized I was alone in this. I slackened the grip and mentality towards work. This was my undoing. I have accumulated some assets in my life but I have ended up giving them away to supposedly badly off friends. I later turned to them in my times of need and they remarked: ‘why did he not save his money for such bad times?’ I could have remained on the very hard roads of life’s toil. I gave up so much. I discouraged myself from achieving more.

That stopped when I stopped consenting to failure. I stopped giving in to fear. I made noise. I discovered what I could be. I immediately designed and embarked on a plan of action to re-educate myself. I crossed out the word ‘quit’ from my action verbs. I went deep into myself and brought out my fears. I decided to surround myself with success. This is my re-birth. I faced anything that belittles me. I set myself on a path of knowledge. I knew I was held back by what I decided not to learn. I knew so much yet knew so little. I chose to know myself. I chose not to consent to silence. I chose not to acknowledge defeat, fear, ridicule and belittling. There is uniqueness in every one as long as we all know we are capable of being better. I am unique and different. I looked into myself with honesty. I am full of life and am around loving people. I got to see this because I made decisions that galvanize us more as we continue interacting.  I do appreciate the people I come into contact on a daily basis. They appreciate me too. I am conscious, I am part of them and I matter to them.  I continued interacting with them as I continued on the path to self actualization.  I shared my dreams with them. They were honest with me. They guided me as I continued being open to them. I admitted I needed their help. I would give them guidance too.  I worked consistently and persistently.  This is what made me who I am.  This now defines me.  The world inside me was cleansed.  I decided to make a new garden in me. I make sure that I listen to myself, evaluate myself and reduce all sensual reports, experiential cues and visceral stimuli into a unified common purpose and goal. I am true to myself above all.  Truth follows as night does day. I am sure then I cannot be false to any other person. I decided not to be silent lest I am understood to consent to failure. 

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